This fall I noticed myself avoiding my writing practice.
This practice has been a consistent source of joy in my life for many years, but all fall I was procrastinating, doing just about anything except writing. I was still journaling every morning, but I would find other things to do instead of writing right after as I usually do.
I’ve learned though, that sometimes my procrastination is helpful (reminder: sometimes = not always). Sometimes, it is showing me something important, opening my eyes.
This time, I knew what was going on. I could feel something deep inside me telling me it was time to begin sharing the Real Life Magic stories. I’ve written about this project before, where I interview people about times they’ve experienced magic in their lives. This could be real stories of miracles, unexplainable events, experiences with signs, synchronicities, following intuition against logic, prophetic dreams, etc. These stories could be big life-changing events or tiny moments in daily life. I shared some of my own Real Life Magic stories on this substack last year (like this one, this one, and this one. - one of those is
’s actually)Hearing these stories makes me believe that the universe has my back because sometimes life is hard and sometimes I feel lost. Through the challenges we all face and the inevitable hardships, it feels good to feel the awe and magic of the universe, even for a moment.
This fall though, when my writing well dried up and I knew I was still avoiding this Real Life Magic project I’d been wanting to share for years, I started to doubt my belief in the universe altogether. My rational brain told me signs and synchronicities were not real and I started to believe it because I hadn’t experienced any of my own in a long time. Nothing seemed to be happening, except mundane everyday life.
One morning, during this short period of doubt, I opened up to a random page in Women Who Run with the Wolves and saw this passage, which has been one of my favorites for the last few years:
“Before Zen, mountains were mountains and trees were trees.
During Zen, mountains were the thrones of the spirits and trees were the voices of wisdom.
After Zen, mountains were mountains and trees were trees.”(This version of this saying is from ‘The Women Who Run with the Wolves” by Clarisa Pinkola Estes who quotes an old saying, but I’ve heard it in different forms quoted by Dōgen).
It made me smile to see and reminded me of something that I learned long ago in almost every spiritual tradition that I’ve studied: not to get too attached to the mystical or exciting experiences of life because they will come and go and it is all part of it.
It is truly all part of it. Life is always going to be life - the magic and the mundane, the good and the bad, the joy and the tragedy, the love and the heartbreak, the clarity and the feeling of being lost, the death and the new life, the endings and the beginnings, the easy flow and the challenging moments, all existing at once.
It was a great reminder that although I often have flashes of deep knowing, moments of synchronicity, signs, miracles, and little jokes from the universe, moments when I know, without doubt, that the next step is clear, that I cannot only get attached to only this part of life.
I still have chores, taxes, and work to do. I still have fear and doubt, conflicts, and tough decisions to make in the in-between. I make mistakes and fall back into old patterns. I still have relationships to tend to, dinner to make, work to do, errands to run, bills to pay, and cleaning up to do. Regular life rolls back and everything feels mundane. And I am still human and sometimes it feels like nothing is happening and what is the point anyway? The mundane always comes back after the unexplainable moment of clarity, intuition, signs, knowing, whatever.
After these Real Life Magic moments, the mountains become mountains again and the trees become trees again, as they always do. Sometimes I forget these cycles and that different seasons of life are for different things.
It is all part of it though. When I remember the mundane is sacred too, I am content with a simple life and simple joys. When I remember that all of these things can become sacred parts of tending to our lives, it becomes easier. It is normal to forget.
This is weaving mindfulness, spirituality, and surrender into daily life. That is the real stuff. Getting comfortable in the middle spaces. The mundane aspects of life are always going to be there and I need to remind myself again and again that I can bring softness and joy into those too, especially as I share Real Life Magic.
All this is to say that I feel the winds are shifting in my creative life.
It is time to share Real Life Magic with the world.
I have ten interviews to share and I may be absent from Substack for an undetermined amount of time, as I put this project together.
BRB, Real Life Magic is coming soon.
P.S. If you have a story you’d like to share with me, please reply to this email and we can set up an interview :)
Upcoming Retreats:
I am hosting two retreats this year: Morocco in May and Panama in June.
Please pass along the info if you know anyone interested.
such a good reminder and i’m so excited!!!